No New News To Share

I haven't posted much. I just realized it and decided that even though I have nothing to report, I should post something. Our house has been on the market a couple of weeks now and that has kept me preoccupied, which is good, because it gets my mind off the wait. I do think I will be waiting close to 2 years. It is a major bummer. This has caused some confusion for my family because I need to make an important decision. Our home in Florida won't be done until around August 2008. If our house sells soon, we are planning on renting in our town so my children can finish one year of school here. The problem is that our town is very small. Not even a street light. So I don't know if I can find a rental here. If I move out of town, my girls will have to switch schools. This really is not something I want to do to them, because in Florida they will have another new school. So, I was contemplating moving straight down to Florida. Our new town is big and there will be a rental. But, this is where the adoption wait causes a big problem. If he isn't home yet when we move- everything needs to be redone including the I600a which I just redid. International adoption is sooo irritating! Also if we move- none of our family will meet him because they are all up here. What to do!!! I looked up rentals here in town and it lists zero on every website. One thing I have to remember is our house may not sell for a year and then we won't need to worry about rentals, just going bankrupt. I guess my gut says I need to find a rental in town. I will just put up a big sign that says- Help No Home Family of Four with a gazzilion animals!

Our house is officially For Sale

Our house is now with all the other hundred homes in our very close area on sale. Not the best timing, but the house in Florida cannot wait for the market to get better and I heard it is going to get worse. So, we are going for it. Hopefully we won't still be showing it a year from now. I am already very tired of keeping it sparkling everyday. Our baby may never see the home we have lived in for the past six years. If all goes as planned, he will come home to a very tiny apartment jammed with cats, rats,parakeets,a snake, a gerbil and four family members. Or if the referral keeps dragging on- he will come home to Florida instead of New Hampshire to a brand new home. My life is always a question mark. Our ducks whom I love dearly have been transferred to a new home. My original plan was to drive them down to our new house, but the realtor didn't think it would help the selling of the house with ducks wandering all over the yard and feathers everywhere. I find it adorable- but some people are not animal people. So, I found them the best home I could. I also think it is for the best because it would be hard to find a temporary rental that allows ducks if this place sells quickly. I also don't know if they would survive the two or three day travel south. I will have new babies when I get down there. I am having a pond dug for them in the back. It isn't the same as having mine, but at least they have a safe home. I will keep you posted. If any of you are looking to move north- there is a nice house for sale with a great view!

19 Months down ??? months to go

Could we finally be getting to the finish line? Probably not, but it helps me to dream. I sent in my new photo album which was supposed to be more extravagent than my original. Well, the reply I got from my caseworker was that it turned out simple but well done. That's me! I don't have any extravagence in me even when I try.I included a card from each of my daughters written to the birthmom. We will see if it makes a difference. It is on its way to Cathwel now. I am hoping that we will hear by October so we can travel around March. By March our house will hopefully be sold and we will be moved into a temporary apartment until August when we move to Florida. I don't want to travel to Taiwan and have to come home and still show our house. That is not the time I want to worry about being clean. My coordinator said that families wait an average of 2-3 months to be picked after being shown, so if she is correct that we are being shown- October seems possible. Even Christmas will work for me. In February our homestudy expires for the second time. It appears we will be redoing it again. Last time it was pretty simple to redo. I think if we are in an apartment, we may have a bit more to have checked but compared to the immigration paperwork I redid, this will be a piece of cake.

You are wondering if the snake ate? NOOO! It has been almost 3 weeks. I have talked to reptile specialists and they said not to worry, yet. He is a baby so we can't let it go on forever, but they think he will shed soon. They said to continue with the thawed food and when he is hungry, he will eat. I will resort to live food when he is on his death bed. As he gets bigger, so does the live food and it eventually turns into looking like Walter our rat. I saw him drink for the first time yesterday. How funny. He slithered over to his bowl like a dog and stuck his head in and drank for a while. It was cute. He isn't fuzzy like my other pets, but he has his own cuteness.

Anyone else getting tired of this?

I was just suggested by my caseworker to redo my photo album. Perhaps that will help us to stand out. Basically translated into- our album is boring and the moms are picking everyone else instead of us. This is not something I want to do right now or ever. But of course knowing that our boring album has been sitting there for 19 months, I stayed up until 2am doing it. It isn't at all fancy. I don't do fancy. I am who I am. So, hopefully she picks us for us. Our house goes on the market in less than two weeks and the blasted snake still will not eat. I am not going to try live food. He will have to manage with thawed or live somewhere else. We have live food as pets and I cannot go to the pet store and purchase pets that we have as family members and watch him strangle them to death. Frozen rodents are alot easier to accept. I have a call into our local reptile dealer to see if they can help. So, no baby still, a skinny snake and going crazy getting this house together in time. This is my life. It is always interesting. Never dull around here.

OK, now I am ticked off! I told you that our-well my daughter's-new baby ball python ate his first meal last week. I was very excited because I had read in numerous articles how hard it can be. So...this week I figured it would be a piece of cake. I have gone through three mice in three days trying to get him to eat. I don't need this stress right now. He takes a look at it, smells it and then slithers over it to look at other things. Eventually he either falls asleep on it or I get so angry I put him back in his tank and throw it away. Man! Our house goes on the market in two weeks. I don't need anorexic snakes right now. Any suggestions from snake experts? I found myself actually having a conversation with him. I told him he was being very fresh and if he wants to starve then fine. I am going nuts! I have also decided I am never selling another home again. I don't want to be "super clean mom" right now. I had to pack up most of my girls toys and I have to nag them to keep everything spotless. I don't want to do this.I have done it before and it stinks. We are building a home in Florida and although it won't be complete until next summer, we are selling our home now. Or at least we will try. The market is horrible and we can't risk it not selling in time. Since there are so many other houses on the market, we have to keep it sparkling clean and we had to repaint and box up alot of our things. So we will pack it up if it sells and move temporarily into an apartment in NH so the girls can finish up one more year of school here. And hopefully in amongst all this chaos-A call will come with A BABY. It is too complicated to move to Florida without having the baby yet. I have to redo paperwork again. At least if I stay in NH, I can just update my homestudy. I will keep you updated on Pete's progress.

The snake ate! What a load off my mind. It was actually pretty interesting. I want to feed him again. It reminded me of the movie Anaconda when he raised his body up and looked at the food and then opened up his mouth. It was just in mini-version. It was the first time I saw inside his mouth and his teeth. Lots of them. Since his food is so tiny, I don't feel so bad about giving it to him. When he gets bigger and eats more, I am sure it will be tough to do.

So I got an email from my caseworker the other day. I haven't made a big deal out of it, because I have been let down before. She said she got an email from the orphanage and from what the coordinator said it "sounds" like we have been already been presented to the birthmothers. Now I don't get my hopes up because I was told this before. About four or five months ago. Also I know that just because we may have been shown, it doesn't mean we will be picked yet.So, I am still planning on a few more months. But you never know, do you...

18 1/2 Months...but who's counting?

Well, we got back from Canada. That got my mind off things for five days. When we got home we got my daughter the pet that she has wanted for a while. A Python. Yes, I did say a Python. Right now Petey-named after her favorite rock band star,Pete Wentz, of course- is only about 16 inches long. Now we don't know if Petey is really a Petey or a Patricia. That makes a big difference in size. Petey will get up to 3 feet on average. Patricia could get to be 4-5 feet. Now if you know me, you know how much I love animals. So, your question would be how could I feed mice to a snake. Well, it is frozen. I don't know if that makes you feel better. It makes me feel better and it is tiny. When Petey gets bigger, so will the mouse. We haven't fed him yet. The tiny mouse is in the freezer and on Friday we will have to defrost him. Yes, I did say defrost him. This sounds insane, I know. Then we give him to Petey and hopefully he eats it. We do this once a week.At first it was hard for me to hold the snake, but I am kind of getting used to him. He is kind of cute. So that brings our pet total to cats,birds,ducks,gerbil,rats-which Petey is not aloud to eat,fish and a python.

Niagara Falls, Canada

The Maid of the Mist

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Niagara Falls here we come!!

We are going back to one of our favorite vacation spots-Niagara Falls, Canada. We figured since we are moving to Florida, it will be hard to get back up there again, and we certainly won't be able to drive there anymore. So, one more trip. This will keep my mind off the waiting. My youngest daughter said the funniest thing. She said she wanted to go to the place in Canada where the rocks go really deep but she couldn't think of the name. I had no clue what she meant. She started getting frustrated that I didn't know what she was talking about. Finally I said-The Grand Canyon? She said yes. I had to tell her that no we can't go there and it isn't even in the right country! Kids are funny. She then wanted to change our trip to drive there instead. I explained how long that drive would take and she understood. The last time we drove to Niagara she was 23 months old and potty training.We had a potty in the car with us. The eight hour drive took 11 because every half hour she would say she had to go and we would pull over. I was tempted to put a diaper on her but I didn't and she was totally trained by the end of the trip! It is a funny story to tell her.

I Hate Being Right!!!!

I thought the wait times were going to increase, then I didn't, but I kind of knew they would even though I was told they wouldn't-following me so far? Now at least one agency has officially changed to 18-24 months! After one follows the rest. Mine ridiculously still says 14 months-come on now! So, I was right. It makes so much sense. There are several families ahead of me at 20 months already. So where does that leave me?? It is mid-June and I anticipate still grouching on here until October. I am bummed but not as irritated as I usually am. I think I already knew and it already sunk in a bit ago. Oh well, what can we do? We are at the mercy of the adoption process now. No turning back and I don't want to turn back. This is kind of fun. Weird huh?

I Didn't Fall!

Well, I made it through the wedding without one trip and the heels stayed on all night! My feet got numb after a while, so it all worked out. My joints still ached and I felt kind of ucky so I had a couple of drinks and the pain went away! All in all I think it went well. My daughters looked beautiful and Billy looked as handsome as he did at our wedding 12 years ago.

As far as any new news goes, the answer is the usual NONE. This is ok, though. I have accepted it. I feel like it isn't too far in the distant future now. Maybe we will break a worlds record for waiting. Actually I think there are many families way past me at this point. He will be cute and worth it. I just don't want to end up traveling during the Chinese New Year. I have heard everything is closed and very expensive. Flights are very expensive also. So, please some news by August. Not likely, I see me flying smack dab during that time. I will go with the flow. Take what I can get. I just want to kiss his little cheeks or chunky cheeks. Any cheeks!

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Now I don't know what to think!

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Well, with the logjam of families that applied when I did, I was sure the wait times were going to change, but now I have heard otherwise. I thought 18-24 months was going to be the new norm, but now me along with the others that are backed up from the immense popularity of Taiwan at that time, are now in the unknown. Will we wait over 20 months or will we be chosen earlier. Nobody seems to know, but apparently after the increase in wait times happened, applications dropped and for those families way behind me, it seems good news. An eventual drop in waits. Not good for us families in the unfortunate situation of having applied when we did. So, for the other families waiting with me, our time will come. We will come out of this black hole. Our children will be even more precious after waiting for them for sooo long and what a story we can tell them someday.

The Wait Will Continue

Well, the verdict is in. The wait times are going to change to 18-24 months. Ah, what is a few more months. Maybe we will be on the shorter end of it. I was prepared for another three months anyway. That will be 20. It is still possible. I believe everything is happening for a reason. For instance, I just got diagnosed with Lyme disease today and I feel like crud. So, a referral now would not be good. I look at it that way, but then again why would Lyme disease happen for a reason. That is not a nice thing to do to a person. Who knows. So when I feel better, the call will come. My problem at this moment is not the baby but the fact that I am in a wedding in three days and I feel like my limbs are going to fall off. Life-it is full of surprises.

Shedding Some Tears Today

Well, the rumor on the adoption group is that the wait is going to change-AGAIN!! The third time for me. First we started at 8-10 months. Then we got to ten months and it changed to 12 months. We got to twelve and it changed to 14-16. We are at 17 and there is a rumor, which makes my stomach churn, that the orphanage is contacting agencies to let them know that the wait is changing to 18-24 months and there are still 12 families waiting from the end of 2005. I am the last one from 2005. Today I broke down. I cannot handle this anymore. Enough is enough. I am ready to give up. I cried and got into bed and slept. I also threw some food on the kitchen floor. It is better than throwing lamps. I woke up to my daughter telling me to come into the kitchen. It was now dark and she and my husband had made me cinnamon rolls. That cheered me up. I checked my email and there was a response from my caseworker saying that she too had heard the rumor and will contact the orphanage early in the week. So the agonizing wait continues.

"To Fall or not To Fall"-that is the question!

So, I have this wedding next Friday. All four of us are in it. My sister-in-law is getting married and I am the maid of honor. Well, I have never been in a wedding before, except for mine of course, but that doesn't count. I also haven't been to a wedding in a loooooong time. And I haven't worn heels in a super loooooooong time. So, I bought the shoes and they are high, which makes sense since they are called high heels, but they really feel high. I feel like I am standing on toothpicks, but they don't look that unusually high. I just think I stink at walking in heels. My concern is at what point am I going to trip at the wedding. Rugs are great, nice shiny dance floors are not. So, my guess is that is where I will fall. They look good though.