Update!

I have received photos of my little man, but I was asked not to share them online at this time. I will tell you all that he is the most precious handsome guy I have ever seen. He has the most pinchable cheeks. If I do get authorization to share, I would love to. You all on the adoption from Taiwan group have been so important to me making it through this long process. You have all been there for me through all the ups and downs and I hopefully have helped some of you along the way. I have been waiting to share with all of you his photos and information but I need to respect my agency and orphanage and not disclose that information until allowed. I can tell you that I love him and my family is thrilled!!!! I will tell everyone that the wait will disappear the moment you see your child's face. He is being very well cared for and I am patiently waiting for the legal documents to come so I can start the courts. I hope to have the quick judge. Every moment you wait for your child will be worth it. I would wait another year for him. I am getting ready to send out a care package to him. This photo I can share with you.

Yes We Got The Call!

It was monday afternoon and I had gotten home from work around 4pm and did some stuff and then happened to check my voicemail and listened to the sound of my caseworkers voice. She left a very vague message about needing me to call her and said she was trying to get me all day but couldn't locate my cell numbers. Well, I started to friek out. My daughters frieked out and we all ran around the room. I called her and of course got her voice mail. So now I am really dying and second guessing what just occurred. Maybe she is just checking in on me. So I decided to check my email for the fun of it. That is when I saw an email from her with exclamation points next to the words -WHERE ARE YOU??? I need to speak to you right now. So that was it. I started crying and running around the room. There was no doubt what that meant. Today was the day I waited for since I can't remember how long. My daughters and I sat looking at the phone for 45 minutes . Oh my god. I will never forget those beautiful words. THIS IS THE CALL. It was a little blurry after that point. I tried to scribble notes. He was born on July 22nd. He will be one or slightly older when he comes home. He was five pounds at birth. He has had the fortune of being raised since Sept. in one of Cathwel's nannies homes and has lived in foster care with that family.
I love him so much and can't wait to see his face!!

Keep Hangin' In!!!!!!!!!!

Give me 24 hours and I will let you know what is going on. Just hang in there a bit longer. Heck, I waited 26 1/2 months. You can wait 24 hours.

FORTUNES

Every Friday night we get take out chinese and open our fortunes. Usually they say something corney. Well, last Friday me and my daughter got fortunes that said this:

Mine "good news of a long-awaited event will arrive soon"
Taylor"good luck bestows upon you. you will get what your heart desires"

We looked at each other and saved them on the kitchen counter. I had a funny feeling.

....Soon I will tell you what happened. Stay tuned.....

All Chilled Out!!!

OK. Now I have pulled it all together. My friend Ann who many of you know on the adoption boards has gotten her referral and well it just makes my life happy!! We have waited this whole time together and I am so happy for her.I now have strength to wait somemore. So, I decided to pull myself together and say - Damn it, I am going to make it through this no matter what. I know there is a baby waiting for me out there. He has to be born. Come on now. I will wait and he will come. That is it. The money will come from somewhere because I will not give up my dream of the last 2 1/2 years. I am not letting this wait take control of me. I will control it and this baby will come- soon! Bring it on.

I Made This To Relax Me

Still Here!

I have been really bad about posting. I am sorry but after a while it gets sad to keep posting no news. There really isn't anything exciting to tell you. I only have bad news and that is not something you want to keep hearing. We have been having a hard time financially and we keep open the possibility of halting the adoption. I don't like even thinking about it but right now there is no money for it anywhere. So no phone call is good for now. I keep trying to think of some way to afford it but can't come up with anything. We took such a hit on our house up north and the Subway hasn't taken off down here in Fl. yet. We have a signed contract to build a home here which we signed long before we had financial problems. We hadn't anticipated on having to put our girls in private school and ya da ya da ya da. The point is there is no money for the adoption. So for that reason I haven't posted much because you don't want to hear it and I don't want to keep talking about it. My husband says that his biggest fear is the phone ringing tomorrow. That makes me feel great. I feel guilty because deep inside I would rather lose our house than lose my baby but I can't say that.So unless something changes we will probably announce the declined referral of our beautiful baby fairly soon. At 25 1/2 months it can't really take much longer. It really makes me mad because I was told 8-10 months. I had the money at that time and loooong after. I had enough money to bring both my children to Taiwan with us also. This is not my fault and there is nothing I can do about it. I may have to tell my daughters they won't be getting the brother they have been waiting for for 2 1/2 years. How do you do that?? It really rips me up. I am sure I am not the only one going through this with the market being so bad right now. It just sucks.I want this baby much more than a new house or to live in Florida. If I had known what I know now I would have stayed put in NH and I would not lose my baby. If a miracle can happen, I need it now. I will keep you posted.

Update!

Well, I just got an update from my caseworker about our family. I had asked if she could contact Cathwel orphanage and ask if there is any news about us. I was beginning to feel like we have been forgotten. She got back to me and said that Cathwel said if you can believe it- there are still a few families from 2005- us included that have not been matched! I thought for sure that all the families from 2005 had been matched except us. What about all the families out there waiting that got on the list in 2006-now. How long are they going to wait if I have already waited 2 years without a match. It is so darn frustrating! Ahhhh! There was nothing else I could ask. All I can do is helplessly wait somemore. She said Cathwel said there is nothing wrong with our family and to take care and be patient. I lost all patience last year. There is no more patience. I want my baby. I have decided that I will get a call by February. That is just the way it is going to be. Ok then, a call this month and that is that.

2 Years! Oh My!!

The Gift of Life

I didn't give you the gift of life,
But in my heart I know.
The love I feel is deep and real,
As if it had been so.

For us to have each other
Is like a dream come true!
No, I didn't give you
The gift of life,
Life gave me the gift of you.
--- Unknown


I found this poem and thought it was nice. We passed two years without a call but hopes are still high. I have some good feelings that the time is coming and the wait is coming to an end- at least this part of it. The next part I can handle better. We are settling in here in Florida, happy to be without the several feet of snow up north already. We have explored some of the beaches and love the wildlife. I thought there was wildlife in Nh. The birds here are enormous- I call them dinosaurs. My daughters are getting used to their new private school and once they make a friend or two will like it here. They still insist that it is better in three feet of snow than here and even when it got to 40 degrees the last day or two they said they were too hot and wanted to go home. Kids are funny. I like everything down here except not having family with us. Christmas was a little bizarre but not as bad as I thought. I met my first floridian- someone who actually was born here. Nobody is. Everyone is from someplace else. It is too funny. Oh and now the retired people have come! Don't drive through parking lots without radar goggles on. They just back up! Everyone warned me about the northerners coming. I didn't think anything of it. I am a northerner. Well these northerners are different. I have never seen a Walmart with as many motorized vehicles in it before. It is a different world down here. I like it though. So now that everyone is settled- we need a call. Ring!!! Darn you!!